So the pound has sunk even lower this week and all UKIP can offer to fix the problem is to punch each other in the head. God help us if they are ever in charge of anything. Saying that UKIP MEP Steven Woolfe shows no signs of a blood clot on the brain. But then how do you clot something that isn’t there.
I was given the UKIP version of Cludo as a gift this year. That’s the one where it doesn’t matter who did it you just always blame the immigrant.
Theresa May has announced new trade deals with the Chinese. Yes I remember they came to visit earlier this year and David Cameron presented them with quite an unusual welcome gift. The entire British steel industry.
As those opposed to Jeremy Corbyn Tweet #GoodbyeLabour perhaps at the same time we should all be texting #GoodbyeScotland.
In other news UKIP have announced they’d like to deport anybody who refuses to speak English. That might prove tricky for the Welsh.
A bellybutton who was a longstanding supporter of in, or as they are known commonly an “innie” has now declared to be a supporter of out, also known as an “outie”
When questioned on why they had changed their stance they remarked “I would like to clear up a few myths about being out of the main part of the body. Just because I am out this does not mean the brain will decamp to Frankfurt. Nor will the bottom lose it’s subsidies. It’s also ridiculous to say that a bellybutton exit or Bexit as we now call it will damage the genitals “special relationship” with the U.S. As for all this scaremongering that the bottom would be more susceptible to terrorist attacks… well that’s just below the belt scaremongering.”
When also asked if this new stance was perhaps a bid to gain the leadership of the backbone at the next election the bellybutton had this to say. “It would be a wonderful thing to be the backbones leader. It is at least five years away which is an aeon in the body politic, by which time whatever my personal ambitions may be, there will be competition from young thrusting body parts both male and female who will be overtaking me so who knows. As I’ve said many, many times before that it’s more likely that I will be reincarnated as an olive or shoved back in by a champagne cork or Unscrewed entirely resulting in the bum falling off.”
More recently the bellybutton has caused controversy by accusing the arms and legs of goose-stepping in a fashion similar to the Nazis.
The question of in or out still remains on a knifes edge.